There are some characteristics that are highly prized.
Detemination is right on top there with the rest of the big guns. I think I've heard this world on average about three times this week so its just about time to share my thoughts on how I feel.
It is a great feat to to come to your purpose and be determined to see its manifestation. We are often told that we should never give up. We should always keep going no matter how hard it is, or how bad it is-but if I dare be honest about how I really feel- its just best to give up.
I have at times seen myself too persistent with the wrong things and wrong people only to come to that realization far too late down the line, or at least what I deem so.
More and more I have developed a laisez-faire attitude. I read an article on sociopathic behavior recently just to ensure that I wasn't losing sight of my human faculties. I prize many things but more and more I have come to value human connection less and less.
I recall in my past where I felt so bound to turn all negatives into positives. I had hope in people and relationships. I felt at that time that I could always make things better if I tried a little harder. I'd come across pictures online about people who gave up too soon, with the treasure,(unbeknownst) right in front of them.I was determined not to give up on things, on goals, on people, on friends, on family. Everything could be fixed with some good old determination and prayer but what I came to see is that, the determination didn't work and the prayers didn't work.
I wanted things and people that were of only seasonal value in my life. I wanted to prize everything and everyone as a forever friend and forever experience. Even know, I squirm in dread sometimes as I see pictures of people I use to know, people I thought I needed in my life...but like the popular Lucian calypso says.."where are they know?", I found myself finding answers to that every day- they were not there anymore and I did not need them as much as I thought I did.
As I have grown more into my own, I have gained more strength from within and depended less on affirmation from other people.
My importance in not validated by the people I keep. God and I are my only constant. Everything changes and I have learned how to live by letting things live, even when that means that they desperately want to live without me.
I have learned how to give up on people. I don't find myself fighting to keep things- I know that the level of this change acceptance is increasing when I couldn't find myself today after calling it and I couldn't be moved not one bit.
Flipping through the losses that I have experienced in my life- I know that it is a divine lesson. I can't honestly say that i'm a master in this because I still hold my family unfathomable close to my heart but many things in my life are neither here nor there.
We're often told how great holding on and getting the prize would feel but very rarely are we told how good it would feel to let go of things,especially those that are simply not for us.
When we start experiencing unnatural resistance- it just may be a sign that the season is over.
I have been actively learning lessons about seasons in my life for 7 years.
I have built ..to have it broken down.
I have gained ...to have it lost or stolen.
I have grown attached..to have my attachments forcefully severed..
and so I know first hand that it really profits nothing to base your intrinsic value on seasons. Had I not remained up to the time, I would have lost myself in many of these experiences..and believe me, I escaped many by the skin of my teeth.
I have been refining my skills in giving up and it has not failed me yet.I try not to upset my spirit by attempting to control things that I can't. I have been better for it as I feel like every relationship lost or found is momentum and acceleration in purpose,
There is nothing wrong with committment and determination but what hurts us is when we are determined to commit ourselves to the wrong things...
I still exist my soulfuls,
just walking through the crowd under the guise of normalcy..with a million and one extravangant throughts roaming through my head and coursing through my being.-Stella
Detemination is right on top there with the rest of the big guns. I think I've heard this world on average about three times this week so its just about time to share my thoughts on how I feel.
It is a great feat to to come to your purpose and be determined to see its manifestation. We are often told that we should never give up. We should always keep going no matter how hard it is, or how bad it is-but if I dare be honest about how I really feel- its just best to give up.
I have at times seen myself too persistent with the wrong things and wrong people only to come to that realization far too late down the line, or at least what I deem so.
More and more I have developed a laisez-faire attitude. I read an article on sociopathic behavior recently just to ensure that I wasn't losing sight of my human faculties. I prize many things but more and more I have come to value human connection less and less.
I recall in my past where I felt so bound to turn all negatives into positives. I had hope in people and relationships. I felt at that time that I could always make things better if I tried a little harder. I'd come across pictures online about people who gave up too soon, with the treasure,(unbeknownst) right in front of them.I was determined not to give up on things, on goals, on people, on friends, on family. Everything could be fixed with some good old determination and prayer but what I came to see is that, the determination didn't work and the prayers didn't work.
I wanted things and people that were of only seasonal value in my life. I wanted to prize everything and everyone as a forever friend and forever experience. Even know, I squirm in dread sometimes as I see pictures of people I use to know, people I thought I needed in my life...but like the popular Lucian calypso says.."where are they know?", I found myself finding answers to that every day- they were not there anymore and I did not need them as much as I thought I did.
As I have grown more into my own, I have gained more strength from within and depended less on affirmation from other people.
My importance in not validated by the people I keep. God and I are my only constant. Everything changes and I have learned how to live by letting things live, even when that means that they desperately want to live without me.
I have learned how to give up on people. I don't find myself fighting to keep things- I know that the level of this change acceptance is increasing when I couldn't find myself today after calling it and I couldn't be moved not one bit.
Flipping through the losses that I have experienced in my life- I know that it is a divine lesson. I can't honestly say that i'm a master in this because I still hold my family unfathomable close to my heart but many things in my life are neither here nor there.
We're often told how great holding on and getting the prize would feel but very rarely are we told how good it would feel to let go of things,especially those that are simply not for us.
When we start experiencing unnatural resistance- it just may be a sign that the season is over.
I have been actively learning lessons about seasons in my life for 7 years.
I have built ..to have it broken down.
I have gained ...to have it lost or stolen.
I have grown attached..to have my attachments forcefully severed..
and so I know first hand that it really profits nothing to base your intrinsic value on seasons. Had I not remained up to the time, I would have lost myself in many of these experiences..and believe me, I escaped many by the skin of my teeth.
I have been refining my skills in giving up and it has not failed me yet.I try not to upset my spirit by attempting to control things that I can't. I have been better for it as I feel like every relationship lost or found is momentum and acceleration in purpose,
There is nothing wrong with committment and determination but what hurts us is when we are determined to commit ourselves to the wrong things...
I still exist my soulfuls,
just walking through the crowd under the guise of normalcy..with a million and one extravangant throughts roaming through my head and coursing through my being.-Stella
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